[Epilogue] for A letter from a Japanese woman

©︎Shiho Niimi @sviesosdaina

First of all,

 I would like to thank Siho and her family, friends from her Georgia days, and MC Shirafu , who is a composer and songwriter of Utsukushiki Hikari,  for their help in releasing this letter along with the music. 

Along with this, I would like to express my big gratitude to Shiho for letting me take this long journey of memory with you.

One of the things that encouraged Shiho to share her hurt, which she had been unable to tell anyone for years, and which she was willing to share with the huge ocean of the Internet for this time, was a quote by Martin Luther King Jr.

“The ultimate tragedy is not the oppression and cruelty by the bad people but the silence over that by the good people.”

—- 

Without blaming people for being different, but keeping looking for a future where we can be together., this is also Shiho‘s way of moving toward the light as breaking her silence. 

Light. 

The word "light" is not only in Shiho's mind but also in the mind of MC Sirafu of "Utsukushii Hikari," the artist who created this song. 

He recalled the background behind the creation of "Waiting for a Friend.

“At the time, I was going through a period of mental depression due to personal reasons.

I was alone in my room feeling gloomy, and it was raining hard outside. I remember playing the guitar all at once, surrounded by a sense of loneliness.

But it was not a testament to my gloominess, but perhaps an expression of my desire to find salvation somewhere.

However, it was not that I was looking for help from "someone.

I guess he expressed his vague anxiety as a "friend".

When I finished the song, I remember that it had turned from raining heavily to sunny and the light was shining through the window”.

 The name of the band, Utsukushiki Hikari[that means “beautiful light” in Japanese], also came from Sirafu's own daily experience of accompanying a disabled person to a swimming pool at that time.

“When I looked up from the water and saw the light reflected in the scenery, the word "Utsukushiki Hikari" suddenly came to mind.

I dared to use “hiragana” notation instead of “kanji” because I aimed for a completely innocent expression”

He knew, as asking Shiho to make a video for the song, her grasping of this world, her pure sensibility, combined with the music, exudes even more. 

In addition to this letter, Shiho and I have been springing from the past and the present (about me being in Portland, one of the super blue cities, movies, and books relating to BLM and the issue of climate change, etc.).

In the meantime, we were saddened by the shooting in Georgia that targeted Asians across the pacific ocean from Japan and Portland OR. 

As you know, although, discrimination is on the rise, not on the decline.

But it is a sign of change that is coming to light as people become more aware of issues that have been ignored for so long.

Every so often, we confirmed each other that, rather than directing our inner anger, anxiety, and loneliness at someone else or anonymous world,

let’s turn those feelings into compassion, coexistence, and understanding, and try to take action.

As we are doing so,

to borrow a lyric from "Waiting for a Friend”,

sooner or later

"The waiting scene comes to be bright” and you[ and we] are “starting to dawn” 

Knowing that I am living in an optimistic, sexist world,

the reason why I am publishing this letter today, please forgive me saying this, that it is more of a reminder and even affirmation to myself than anything else.

I am hoping that we can merge under the same light coming from diaverse directions.

On the very last day of 2021 Asian American and Pacific Iskander Heritage[AAPI] Month.

Sakiko/Soen